My biggest regret ever is getting my Sociology professor pregnant. We fell in love and started dating 4 months ago. Now she’s pregnant with my baby. She’s 40, and I’m 19. I don’t want her to lose her job, but I want to marry her and be a good father. I don’t know what to do.
“Every time she laughs, an angel dies. Even telemarketers avoid her. Her birth was payback for the sins of man. But you know the worst thing about her? She works for the library.”—Ron Swanson (via leeroyjenkins)